"I ordered a big glass of fuck it." She said.
I never got her. Her personality was your stereotypical housewife with a catch.

(insert social news networking site)

The quality of the news submitted has drastically fallen. It's now the "he said, she said" bullshit.

There is already enough crooks in the world, enough slander by the truth, yet modern day journalism is just full of rumor and speculation. God bless America 

RL Lurk #1

So, i was out in the world today, which happens to be cinco de mayo. Standing in a checkout line, listening to some awful jackass drool into his phone about his plans, it occurred to me that he was making plans to celebrate someone else's holiday. For vicarious swine this holiday is just an excuse to get piss drunk off of shitty beer and get girls loaded on tequila, neatly wrapped in a hot plastic skin of vague, americanized latin culture. Eat shit.

Anyone, other than the relevant peoples, celebrating Cinco de Mayo in america is an asshole.

Humans are weak.

Lurk horsepower

lurking for your third eye

I feel like been hatin on the web so,

Im gonna give you the mad note's to makin de-lic-ious FRUIT SAUCE!

Out of 8 parts:

7/8's is honey.
1/32's is salt.
1/16's is lime juice.
1/32's is chili powder.

Mix to taste.

Put on real fruit.
Fuck canned fruit.