The best i could do on such short notice

In Chicago.
Dont come here, foreigners aren't welcome


lurk public transit at its greatest.

What ruins the party?

Fat chicks and dick.
Thanks for ruining my party.

Friday...

is payday

Talking to a professional.

Here in Oklahoma,

We only listen to credible sources.

Have fun being creepy

lurk my job.

I call too many girls

sluts.

Hat's off to you, Butthole Eyes.

We had these freakish tornados during last week that totally wrecked my cable's shit. So, I did what every person in the square mile radius does when the cable goes out: Called and complained.

Fast forward to fucking Mother's Day. My mother and I were treated to "Butthole Eyes: Your Cable Wizard", Prompted with lame conversation, and then when I asked what model number MY cable box was, He remarked like an asshole "If you modify the firmware, We'll cut of your service."

You know what, I don't give a fuck. I'm not going to fucking update the shit and you can get fucking bent. Plus, your eyes look like rashy, little boy assholes.

For the record, Cox Communications, You probably want to train you technicians in human relations and not in dumbfuck...